Unfortunately for us, when we decide we prefer riding the queer train and hop off at station “Girl-On-Girl,” there is no tour guide to greet us and lead the way (which is particularly sad, seeing as lesbians make for excellent tour guides). It wasn't so long ago that I was a wide-eyed young gay hungry for the answers to a slew of my pressing questions about lesbian dating. We are taught the rules of the boy-girl dating game at an early age.
I had plans to leave the apartment for some spontaneous exploration, but it was Sunday and I was in no hurry. I really hope her favorite season being autumn is true, yet another beautiful match of the little things we love.
A woman who has recently discovered her gayness can probably fix most things around the house. Still in bed, I snap a pic and send it to answer her asking if I had left on my explorations yet.
Recently, I've been getting a lot of private Facebook messages from baby lesbians who are freshly out of the closet and asking me all kinds of questions:“How do I date girls? I will never forget how terrified I was when I first realized I wanted to exclusively swim in the girl pond. I exerted zero effort into attracting boy creatures, but I learned quickly that I didn't really need to.
It can feel wildly intimidating to be a little, vulnerable kitten tossed into a teeming cesspool of seasoned dykes.
But girls are an entirely different kind of animal.
Women aren't a simple stroll in the park; women are an uphill climb in dangerous weather conditions. Also, lesbian culture, by nature, is extremely elusive.
“We had a really great egalitarian marriage,” she tells me over the phone.
“He was a really awesome feminist guy.” The only problem, she explained, was that he wasn’t a lesbian.
Do I tell her that just minutes before I was checking airfares to Australia and devising reasons to visit her country?
I had been looking at tour dates for a favorite band that I knew would be in Australia in the next few months.
“I adored him, but I needed to pursue this other life.” She was 35 when she finally did.