On the show, the children on the Brady Bunch got along quite well.Source: Shutterstock After sharing a guest-post on step-parenting from the step-child’s point of view, one commenter asked an interesting question: “Should a man with no kids be hesitant to date a woman with kids?
A strong relationship provides security for your children and demonstrates how a loving, respectful partnership should be. After all, they can be so demanding — not to mention fulfilling. When it comes to relationships, I’m fond of saying, But there are a few couples in my life who I look to as models of the kind of marriage I’d like one day. They are the dynamic centriforce around which the family’s life orbits. There is lots of research to suggest that a happy marriage is the cornerstone of well-adjusted kids. D., writes in her relationship guide, The Book of Love: “No matter how sacrilegious it sounds, you need to put your relationship before your children. If you’re not in a committed relationship, it is very easy to make your kids the prominent one in your life. But, in most cases, he won’t be because of these 5 reasons… Boys will be boys A funny thing happens when an immature guy becomes a father – he instantly grows up. You can’t just up and leave your children on a moment’s notice to go out with him. That’s not to say a man without kids can’t be the perfect boyfriend. Help build their friendships long before you actually become a family. Your schedule is too hectic for a man with no kids A man with no children wants to get out and have fun, at all times.In actuality, many childless singles find single moms very attractive as they can, in a lot of ways, be more mature and independent than a young, developing woman. If he is a guy that has never dated a single mom before, chances are he is going to hit a serious learning curve early on in the relationship.
While this isn’t always the case and children don’t always change women for the better, many women grow in maturity exponentially from the moment that baby enters their life. Let the relationship organically grow and see how deep it gets before you introduce the kids and bring them into your relationship. He will need time to think about what it means to him and the new responsibilities that will come his way. Eventually this will all mesh together and he will forget what it’s like to not have kids in his life, but in the beginning stages, it’s important that you meet him at his level at times. It’s important that he sees that you are a strong role model for your kids, but slowly introduce that concept to him.
Help him, guide him and create an environment for him where he has a chance to find his own parenting skills.
Giving him tips is okay, but don’t tell him what to do.
It’s very common for guys with kids to write in their OKCupid profiles: “My kids come first,” or “My daughter is the center of my world! You want a potential mate to know that your life includes the giant presence of a kid or four. Plus, if you’ve gone through divorce or another crisis that landed you as a single parent, you are no doubt concerned about giving your kids extra care and sense of security. But it is even trickier if one or both of the parents put the kids before their partner.
You also want women to know you’re a devoted dad (it’s no secret chicks get hot for guys who are great with kids! It’s no surprise that so many blended families I know struggle with adjusting all parties to a home where everyone is suddenly expected to revolve around the new relationship. One dad I went out with nearly boasted when telling me about a four-month relationship that went sour because his girlfriend did not understand why he’d abruptly leave in the middle of dinner because his tween son would call, upset about some matter with his hockey coach.
In other words, if you’re still in the “dating just to date” phase of your life, involving a woman with a child is probably not the type of relationship you should engage in because your actions will more than likely impact the lives of two people — the woman and the child.