Let's see how dating a girl 10, 20 (or more) years younger to you is quite likely to be a recipe for disaster: Older men who fall for younger women are normally enticed by the seeming innocence and purity of the latter.
As the only straight woman within reach, I soon became the de facto dating consultant for my male friends, despite my waning expertise.
They were even more eager to pick my brain on all things female when I started working as an engineer and data scientist at Ok Cupid, where I analyzed data from millions of daters to get a sense of the “correct” way to date for men, women, and everyone in between.
It doesn’t help that women have been wired for centuries to equate their worth with youth and beauty. “It is often the limiting thoughts a woman has absorbed that can create problems for the couple,” says Winter.
“If she is fearful, insecure and doubting her merit, she will never be able to accept that her younger man loves her.” Winter adds that media reports about Demi Moore’s obsession with looking young are “the perfect example of how the ideal of youth and beauty can torture even the most lovely example of a modern-day woman.” The idea that one must maintain an illusion of youth to keep a younger partner is illogical. “It's an up-front buy that he's willing to accept, because he values the totality of who she is and what she brings to his life.” Talk about family planning.
At the beginning of our relationship, my friends were concerned that his age automatically revealed his readiness to have a long-term relationship and plan a future together.
People in our lives also expressed the fear that if we were to stay together, we may never have a “normal” life.
Further, younger women are likely to have issues that older women have outgrown. Have you ever wondered that when you were all young and pumped-up, you couldn't get the girl of your dreams?
And now when you're nearing forties and look “obviously old”, a hottie 15-20 years younger to you is prostrating her in front you. Sorry for sounding crude but a possible reason can be that you're earning much more than what you were 15 years ago.
When I was a junior in college, a woman called “The Princeton Mom” wrote into our school newspaper telling undergraduate women to “Find a husband on campus before you graduate.”“Forget about having it all, or not having it all, leaning in or leaning out,” she said.
We had more important things to worry about, like the alarming decay rate of our attractiveness.
What is the equivalent of "cougar" for a man who has a younger partner?